Reassessing Divorce? Reason Anew!
Thursday, November 18th, 2010Many couples at the edge of separation still privately and very earnestly reconsider the course they are to go. Is reconciliation the more appropriately way? Any Georgia divorce lawyer can tell you that many divorcing partners still venture out the possibility of compromise even as they fill in the divorce papers. Only a small portion is truly going for divorce and most couples would prefer staying with their mates if amendments become possible, and a Georgia divorce attorney is obliged to explain the disadvantages and advantages of either direction.
Logically all couples seeking divorce do it because they have discord in their marital bond, and can only continue to cohabit with each other if certain changes are established. While nothing in their marriage contracts is stated about any spouse remolding the other according to his or her preferences, people frequently do it and end up frustrated when they fall short. On the other hand, a lot of spouses do meander for the worse as years go by, causing the partner to finally say in the end, Enough is enough! and file for divorce.
If you are one of these long-time marital victims, and are yet asking yourself if compromise is possible while filing the divorce documents, you may ask yourself in its place: Will my desired changes be enough to cohabit with him or her? And is it possible for the amendments to occur? Pretendthat your partner acquiesced to try so you sought a qualified marriage counselor went through the process and chose to live together, again. Would that be adequate to live a new time with him or her, considering all the pain that yet smolder in your past? If the reply to any of the previous questions is no, then going on with the divorce may be sensible.
Seekinga reconciliation only expresses a want to return to something familiar and hence; a manifestation of the fear of the unknown, the life after divorce. But if you reunite you will only be in familiar settings not a known future, which is unpredictable no matter what. So that leaves you on the limits of that identical unknown, using out your days always asking about the what ifs on the other fence of divorce. Living with the pain and heartaches everytime you remember the betrayal and cheating that caused the discord in the first place, and ever sensitive of that loss of trust that may not be forgotten anymore.
So maybe divorce is the best course for you. If you ultimately made the conclusion there is no looking back, not even to view the bridges coming down. Do not call yourself a quitter, nor a loser, nor a failure nor a coward, for you are not any of them. You want to sever your losses, all the previous heavy investments in feelings, time and resources notwithstanding. You are worthy of your own life to live your manner, after all.
But if there is even some happiness in reconciliation, it is worth the attempt. Life teaches us lessons and we do learn them, once in a while. There could be one for you and your mate, in there.